Manifesto – TheReflectivePen – Part three, More goals
MORE GOALS OF TheReflectivePen
This is the third and final part of the Manifesto of TheReflectivePen – part three -“more goals,” a continuation of part two, the first 5 goals, which can be found HERE in a reprint of the entire Manifesto.
6. TO ASK DIFFICULT QUESTIONS
ABOUT DEATH AND DYING
When it comes to death and dying, we often have a visceral response as we pull back from the most certain of life events.
There is an entire lexicon we employ to stay safely distanced from what we don’t want to talk about.
Bucket lists and rainbow bridges are part of the euphemistic infrastructure used to replace Final Wishes and Death.
The process of writing a will or assigning a medical power of attorney often waits until we get a glimpse of a chariot coming our way.
And a decision to wait until the last few days to call for hospice care leaves us stranded along a path on which there could have been many options.
TheReflectivePen steps boldly into the arena of death and explores the fears and defense mechanisms we use to feel safe from the unknown, and discusses alternatives to traditional approaches to end-of-life issues.
7. TO START CONVERSATIONS
One person’s truth arises from a singular perspective before being explored in context with truths of other minds, cultures, religions, and ideologies.
TheReflectivePen offers ideas that may challenge these truths.
Reflection, after all, is an effect of light illuminating an object or idea. It can’t happen in the dark.
Through conversation, light enters the cracks of our’ truths,’ and we are free to discard or embrace new ways of looking at things.
Conversations may occur through comments on the blog, or they may continue as readers share insights and opinions with friends.
The goal is similar to that of a painter who uses line and color to depict a tree as she sees it.
Someday when visitors to an art museum stand before her piece of abstract art, each sees according to their schema.
The truth for the artist is no less ‘true’ than it is for the observer who sees not a towering birch but a tall giraffe.
It is out of the conversation that follows that minds and hearts are opened and changed.
8. TO EXPLORE PATHS TO HEALING
One reality of living a full and long life is that sometimes we are limited by an unwelcome visitor whose name is ‘Illness’.
Illness arrives with a whole family in tow whose names are Anxiety, Financial Loss, Pain, and Fear.
They carry enough baggage to stay quite a while. How do we make changes to accommodate these demanding guests?
They seldom make reservations, and we have no idea how long they plan to stay. Although we may feel eviction is the course to take, the reality is that some of these visitors have no plans to depart.
When that happens, healing is not so much about eviction as it is about accommodation and learning how to be hospitable.
Distinguishing between ‘cure’ and ‘healing’ becomes one path to maximizing health and moving forward across life’s varied landscape.
Another approach is redesigning the guest house, putting space for demanding visitors towards the back, and providing superior accommodations for the guest named Health whom we may have ignored in earlier years.
Health brings a family too, whose names are Creativity, Wisdom, and Patience.
TheReflectivePen explores the path to a full and meaningful life full of unexpected guests in this house.
9. TO OFFER SEEDS FOR REFLECTION
Sometimes a little idea will take root in our lives, and from the DNA within that idea, an entire garden of fruitful thinking may flourish.
One of the dangers of aging is lying fallow like a harvested field.
A season of rest is good for the land, but if it is never replanted, it never realizes its purpose, it never produces fruit, it never impacts the world.
It quickly gets overcome by invasive species of weeds and eventually becomes useless.
When that happens in our lives, we wake up one day with thoughts like, “Is this all there is?” and we lament as life begins to fold around survival instead of growth.
TheReflectivePen’s passion is to offer tiny ideas like seeds to replant imaginations and create a place for readers to get their metaphorical hands dirty, cultivating their gardens of thought through conversation and writing.
10. TO CHALLENGE FIXED MINDSETS
“I’ve always done it that way” – the seven last words of a dying spiritual life.
One definition of death is ‘no more change,’ and one stereotype TheReflectivePen challenges is having a fixed mindset, which tends to get rigid in our thinking as we grow older.
Ideas and reflections are offered not as truths to adopt without consideration but as perspectives to consider, thoughts to chew on, and encouragement to move towards having an open mind and heart.
Having a growth mindset allows for seeds of reflection to take root and eventually produce exotic fruit.
11. TO BRING A MESSAGE OF HOPE AND POSSIBILITY
The ultimate purpose of TheReflectivePen is to sow seeds of hope and possibility for living life to its fullest until the last drop has been savored or poured out.
Using wit and wisdom in a cocktail of ideas, perspectives, and suggestions, the articles explore what it means to grow old, how to keep dancing when the music of life constantly changes its rhythm, and how to remain flexible in spirit and mind as the body begins to stiffen with age.
The writing seeks to stimulate thoughts and conversation around ordinary things and events to promote the collective wisdom of all readers.
And finally, TheReflectivePen shall be a legacy to all people who find aging to be an inconvenient mountain that offers excellent adventure.
CONCLUSION
In summary, TheReflectivePen’s goal is to reach into the following areas and ponder each from different perspectives while inviting conversation with other thinkers.
- To reflect on the ordinary
- To confront challenges of aging
- To inspire creativity
- To discover new paths
- To examine relationships with organized religion and the Divine
- To ask difficult questions about death and dying
- To start conversations
- To explore paths to healing
- Top offer seeds for reflection.
- To challenge fixed mindsets
- To bring a message of hope and possibility
If you missed any of the previous parts you can read the entire Manifesto by clicking HERE.
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Donna Marsh
I certainly have enjoyed your manifesto. I look forward to reading it every Sunday.I particulary like your explanation of cure vs healing. That is a really good insight along with the many others.
I used to go to church every sunday but when I turned 50 I stopped with organized religon as my personal spirituality exploration led me into a different path. I miss the community but my exploration and questions led me away from set beliefs.
Life is so fluid, full of learning, letting go or detaching, adapting to change. It takes place on all levels: physically, emotionally, spiritually. I am so different from who I was at 18 even though, but I feel the same inside. So now I am in my last few chapters of life. How many pages in each chapter is most of the time unknown.
One thing I like to explore is our cultural influence of setting goals. Most of the time its a good thing, but sometimes if out of balance we become driven. We think we are lacking or failing in some way. Sometimes a simple life of being and not WANTING something is so peaceful and full of self discovery or creativity.
I have learned for myself that contentment is a great place to hang out. This involves not setting goals but just stopping and being. Not needing or trying to attain anything, but simply being grateful for what I have now, who I am now, and enjoying the present moment. Our society has a pre-occupation with the future. From a senior citizens perspective …well you get it! I think since the universe is fueled by a creative life force/ master creator and continues to do. Tapping in to my own creativity is a deeply spiritual experential endeavor and the most fulfilling. I thing aging and or retirement naturally points us into this direction so I am embracing this aspect.
Spirituality evolves and is full of change. Life is essentially one big continuum of change fueled by experiences. Embracing change and letting go is everybody’s challenge. Sometimes it goes well and other times we resist which makes life hard and difficult. Grieving the loss of something is painful and that can be a struggle at times.
Last point is that a spritual attitude and practice of gratefulness turns your perspective into a positive outlook. I did not know this as a younger person. I actually had to learn this lesson in later years as I was simply unaware. Slow the pace of life down enough to be aware will ultimately make for a happier life.
Bonnie Keast
This list was filled with delicious metaphors. Illness as an unwelcome guest, reflection as replanting the field, and questions of death as a language lesson all helped “turn the soil” for new thinking. You are on a roll!
Thank you for sharing your questions and your wisdom.
Dara Perfit
I love your analogy of your mind being a guest house/ guest room. Long ago my therapist suggested to me that we control our own thoughts and can choose what we pay attention to. Since I am primarily a visual person, thinking of a guest room puts it into a visual form and helps me to think about the concept in a different way.
I know that in this past year we have been thinking of illness and death more so furnishing our guest house with meaningful furniture is such a positive exercise that I will try to continue.