Beyond DNA: The Two Threads of Our Legacy
When we think about what we pass on to our descendants, we usually think first of DNA.
DNA is like nature’s ultimate hand-me-down, passing along Aunt Betty’s musical talent or Uncle Joe’s distinctive nose.
Scientists even discovered something fascinating called epigenetics, which shows how our life experiences can influence our genes’ behavior.
Think of it as your DNA wearing different outfits depending on your lifestyle choices!
Last week, my older son looked at a recent photo of myself with both of my sons, now grandfathers themselves, and said, “I never realized how short you are Mom, until I see you next to us.”
My son was born with curly red hair like his grandfather and is short like me.
His hair today has turned a dusty grey. His brother is almost bald and tall like his father.
More Precious than DNA?
It got me thinking about what we really pass down to the next generation. Sure, the DNA lottery gave these boys (men!) their height and hair patterns.
But then I remembered something far more precious: how they both love to work with their hands, skills taught to them by their grandfather when they were very little.
You see, we’re all walking around with two kinds of inheritance in our back pockets. First, there’s our DNA – that twisted ladder of genes that decides everything from our eye color to whether we can roll our tongues.
But here’s where it gets really interesting – and why I sometimes chuckle at those ancestry websites that claim to tell you everything about your heritage.
They can’t tell you about the time my mother taught me to always eat everything on my plate so I wouldn’t go hungry —a lesson she learned through the depression, and that shapes all my visits to a buffet!
I had to learn to ignore this advice because it was shaping more than my visits.
The Shape of Our Stories
No genetic test can measure the impact of the stories we tell, the wisdom we share, or the kindness we spread.
I remember leading a youth group at church once. While chatting with a group of young teens, I shared my mother’s old saying: “Worry is like a rocking chair – it gives you something to do but gets you nowhere.”
Two months later, one of the girls told me she repeated those words to her stressed-out friend before a big exam.
That’s what I call a personal legacy – it’s like dropping a pebble in a pond and watching the ripples spread in ways we never imagined.
These invisible threads of influence – our stories, our values, our little bits of wisdom – they’re just as real as the DNA in our cells.
Sometimes even more powerful. After all, genes might determine if you can carry a tune, but they don’t teach you which songs are worth singing.
Reflections with Aging
Speaking of songs worth singing, aging brings its own special melody to this reflection on legacy.
At 77, I’ve discovered something that never showed up in my younger years’ to-do lists: the gift of time to really think about what matters.
While my knees might creak more than they used to, my heart has grown richer with stories to share.
When we’re younger, we often obsess about leaving our mark through big achievements – building a portfolio, writing books, or making scientific discoveries.
These are fantastic goals, but life has taught me that legacy often whispers rather than shouts.
It’s in the small moments: teaching my granddaughter to bake bread using the same motions my grandmother taught me or sharing with a neighbor whose adult child was just diagnosed with Parkinson’s how I navigated living with MS as a young single mom.
My Legacy
Sometimes I wonder: what will people remember most about me when I am gone?
The size of my portfolio or the way I lived with the belief “Things have a way of working out?”
Will they recall my hazel eyes or the way I taught them to look for beauty through the lens of a camera?
The beautiful truth is that while we can’t choose our genetic legacy, we get to actively shape our personal legacy every single day.
It’s like having a garden where DNA provides the soil type, but we choose what to plant and how to tend it.
Your Legacy
Here’s what I’ve learned about cultivating a legacy worth passing down:
Start Today, Start Small Yesterday, I wrote down the story of how my father taught me to fish – not just the technique, but the patience it taught me.
My great-grandkids might not inherit my fishing skills through DNA, but they’ll have this story forever.
Consider keeping a “legacy journal” – it doesn’t have to be fancy, just real. A small story per page is all that it takes.
Share Your Stumbles Too Some of the most valuable things we pass on aren’t our successes, but how we handled our failures.
That time I went through bankruptcy and lost our home?
I would never have chosen to move from my small country farm into an apartment in the city, but neither would I have met my second husband, returned to school, and begun a whole new career at 45.
Plant Seeds of Hope Every time we rise from the ashes of our failures, we’re creating a legacy that ripples outward.
Remember, someone is always watching and learning, especially the little ones who inherit both our genes and our examples.
My Challenge to You
Here’s my challenge to you: Take 15 minutes today to think about your own double-stranded legacy.
Grab a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle.
On one side, list the genetic gifts you’ve received (good or challenging).
On the other side, write down three wisdom nuggets you’d like to pass on.
Then pick just one of those wisdom pieces and share it this week – with a grandchild, a neighbor, or even in a social media post.
You might be surprised how many lives you touch.
Because while DNA might determine the color of our eyes, it’s our personal legacy that determines how brightly they shine with purpose.
What’s Next?
Want to share your legacy story or learn more about capturing your memories for future generations?
Join [thereflectivecollective], a group on Facebook of people who love to share their stories.
Remember, we’re all writing our legacy story every day – make today’s chapter count.
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