Dekker on Aging
Hi. If we haven’t met before, my name is Dekker. I welcome you to this site where I write once a month to help people out with their problems.
It’s what I do.
I am a service dog and I just love listening to people’s problems and reminding them that we are all in this life together — people, dogs, trees, whales…and even cats!
This is me when I was a pup. I just had my seventh birthday and I have grown up a whole lot since this picture was taken.
Pups age a whole lot like people which may be why I am starting to get questions about growing old.
I guess I do look a bit different now with grey hairs on my chin so every now and then I like to look back to when I was young.
If you have questions for me, leave them in the chat below and I’ll do my best to answer them.
Dear Dekker
I heard you had a birthday since your last post and I notice you are getting some grey hairs on your chin, but you don’t seem any different to me. I, on the other hand, get really upset when I see grey hairs on my chin. It tells the world that I am getting old and I can’t really do anything about it. Any advice for someone like me?
Thanks, from one old codger to another
Woof Woof. You can call us old codgers if that makes you feel better, but I wonder why you focus so much on growing old.
My person loves me, and that is the only thing I care about.
She looks a bit different than when we met. I see grey hairs on her chin too— but she smells the same, which may be because there is always kibble in her pocket.
My advice is to make sure you don’t smell any different and find different words to describe yourself. How about “wise old dog?” for starters?
Dear Dekker
I love to sew as a hobby, and my husband ties flies so he can go fishing when the weather is warmer. I don’t know how we would get through hard times without our hobbies, but we are both starting to lose our keen vision and I get scared that we won’t be able to continue. Is our only recourse to sit and grouse at each other?
Dot and Ditto
Woof woof Dot,
Grouse? Is that like bird hunting? I suppose taking up the sport of grousing is an option.
Personally, I am not much of a bird hunter, so I don’t have much to say about that. I would lose my job in a hurry if I started complaining about everything that crossed my path.
I get kibble for staying focused. When it comes to getting through hard times, my best advice is to stay focused.
You don’t need good vision to do that.
Focusing is a skill you can learn and apply to anything. To get better at it, the most important thing to practice is ‘leave it!’
Once you can say ‘no’ to things you find difficult, like sewing and fishing, you will be free to sniff out new things that you don’t need keen vision to do.
Dear Dekker,
I am going to retire this year and I am afraid I may be bored without a job to go to. I have worked every day of my life since the age of 7 when I helped my dad milk the cows. I left the farm at eighteen, but not the habits I learned there. When I retire and go to bed at night what will I do when the sun comes up the next day. No farm. No job. No future. I am scared of aging out of life. Can you help me.
Dudley
Woof woof, Dudley. I cannot do anything about aging. It happens to all pups.
And every time we age a little, we change a little, like moving from farm to school to job.
I moved from puppy school to prison and then again to serve my person. When I am too old to do this job well, I too will be retired.
I can’t speak for all pups (or people) but I can share what I plan to do.
I plan to sleep lots! And dream!
I can stop working, but no one can expect me to stop dreaming. Do you let yourself dream?
After I retire, there will still be someone I can snuggle with. Do you like to snuggle? I plan to do a lot of that. We can always love no matter how old we get, and the world needs lots of love.
Dear Dekker,
I lived in 4 generation family when I was a child, loving most of all to sit in my great grandmother’s lap listening to her read bedtime stories. Now I am the great-grandmother and my family is all over the map. I get lonely and would love to have a dog like you, but I am too old to take care of it. The best I can manage is a goldfish, and they aren’t very snuggly.
Lonely Gram
Woof woof, Gram. I hear you and am glad you are not blaming your family for making a life away from your home.
My person also misses her grandchildren. She talks about them a lot and prays for them too, although I don’t quite understand prayer.
I know I have a ‘snuggle hole’ that cannot be filled when I am apart from my person. It may be why I feel hungry all the time. To fill a snuggle hole.
I get hungry especially when I feel lonely but then I gain weight and my person has to cut back my kibble. I don’t want that to happen to you.
When I want to snuggle, and she is busy I go hunting in my toy box for just the right fuzzy thing to hold and curl up with. What is in your toy box? I would be happy to share my new pink fuzzy elephant if that would help.
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